Mommy told me that I wasn't too good at startin' stories. She was right, I guess. But here I am, an' I gotta start somewhere. I had just had my eight birthday, so I still didn't understand much. My oldest brother, Bert, was real keen on sports. When he was my age, he convinced mommy and daddy to buy a basketball hoop. Daddy would go outside with Bert and help him out, but Bert didn't need no help. Bert was hard working and and he was what my mom called down-to-Earth. I didn't really get that-he was standing up just like the rest of us-but mommy always smiled those smiles that made her eyes crinkle when she said it, so I guessed it was a good thing.
The only reason I knew what my brother looked like when he was my age was 'cuz there was a picture of him fishing in our hall. Mommy said that Bert loved fishing and would stay outside near the water for hours trying to catch something. I asked if he coulda brought a baseball glove instead, since Bert always catched things with his favourite glove, but mommy scrunched up her nose and said it didn't work that way. Another thing with Bert was that he loved animals. When he finally did catch a fish, he would just let it go. I asked what the point of catching a fish was if he weren't going to eat it, but mommy said it was fun. Didn't sound fun to me!
One time Bert caught a small fish and brought it home and put it in a fishbowl. An' he was always begging mommy and daddy for a pet. They said no every time. I kinda wanted a pet, too! I loved animals as well, and would always sing to them. Daddy said it was funny that I did that, since he once saw Bert singing to a raccoon and then the raccoon trusted him enough to allow Bert to pet him! I still didn't understand why it was funny that I sang to animals, though.
I never really saw my eldest brother 'cuz he begged my parents to send him to a military school. They agreed, but even now I heard them whispering 'bout it. "He wants to join the army," daddy said.
"He'll get killed!" mommy said.
I heard daddy sigh and their voices went all hushed, so I pressed my ear to the door super tight. Then I heard daddy talking. "He won't be able to be the king and join the army."
"So he's exempt from his duties?" mommy said. I didn't know what exempt was, but when I looked it up later the dictionary said 'to be freed, or released from something.'
"Who'll take the throne?"
"Seppen, I guess."
"What about Harry?"
"Seppen is second in line!" They argued some more, but I didn't understand none of it. I was real surprised that mommy didn't want Harry to be king, 'cuz Harry was like a clone of mommy. He had her hair, her eyes, her nose, her mouth, her chin... Even when he was just a toddler, he was just 'bout attached to mommy.
Anyways (mommy told me that 'anyways' innit a word), the day before Bert was going to leave for his military school, something real bad happened. He was exercising in front of the television when grampa (who had also gone to the same military school that Bert was going to) got up from writing his last book. It was snowing real bad outside, and it was falling as fast as mommy's tears after a sad movie, so mommy and daddy and gramma thought it was normal for grampa to feel extra chilly and for his bones to be all achy. But when Bert turned 'round and saw grampa glowin' an' he just knew that it weren't right, he called for gramma to come down real quick.
Daddy was out on one of his investigation cases. Mommy was upstairs with Harry an' me, back when we were just toddlers, an' Seppen was coming home from her after-school ballet classes, so it was just Bert and gramma. Mommy said that she had never seen anyone cry as much as gramma when gramma had to tell daddy that grampa died. Everyone, 'cept Harry an' me 'cuz we were too young, were real sad after, and doubly so 'cuz Bert had to leave feeling sad. The day he left, he got mommy to shave his head an' he dressed up in a nice suit and looked real smart. Mommy still wasn't keen on him leavin', but she took a picture of him leavin' anyway. He looked real sad, but real proper too.
Since gramma had retired when she hit the peak of her career, she had a whole lotta time left. Mommy said that sometimes, she would catch gramma in her singing dress, staring at food she just cooked, even though we all just ate. Daddy told me that gramma's parents died when she was little, so she had to live with her evil step-mother and step-sisters and cook and clean for them. Daddy said that grampa saved her by marrying her. They met at a ball where her fairy-godmother transformed her into a beautiful woman with makeup and a pretty dress and a horse and carriage. She had to leave before midnight though, and when she ran back to the carriage she lost her glass slipper. Grampa found it and then said that he would marry the girl that fit the shoe. He found gramma and she fit the shoe, so he married her. That's why grampa's urn that held his ashes was engraved with, 'The man that found the shoe.'
Harry told me that it's a load of hogwash, and it's all fairy tales. I dunno what hogwash meant, but I liked to believe that gramma really did live a fairy tale life.
With all the free time gramma had on her hands, she also helped mommy out with Harry an' me. She was the one who pointed it out to mommy that Harry and I hated wearing clothes. Even now, Harry an' I don't like shoes or socks or anything. When we were toddlers daddy and mommy and gramma gave up and just left us in our diapers. 'Cuz of that, when people came over and they were told that we were twins, they automatically assumed that we were both boys. I also didn't have loads of hair-Harry had more than me, still do, an' I teased him sometimes that he lived up to his namesake, which was a word Seppen taught me.
So that others could identify my gender, gramma put a big bow on my head. She was real surprised when I didn't tear it off like I did with all the other stuff I owned.
The first real clear memory I had was of gramma. But it weren't a nice one. A few months after grampa died, daddy, mommy, and Seppen went to the park to celebrate Seppen's first snow day. Gramma said that she wouldn't be able to handle the cold, so she stayed with us. With soft blankets of snow growing heavier by the minute and slick streets, it was a perfect afternoon to snuggle up in front of the fireplace with a blanket, hot chocolate and a good book. Gramma had other ideas on her mind though.
She had dressed Harry and I up real nice. Since I didn't own any nice clothes, she put a dress that Seppen wore when she was a toddler on me. She was shocked when I didn't fuss and actually liked the dress. Harry stopped crying about wearing his toddler suit when he saw that I was wearing clothes.
So gramma brought us down to our makeshift family crypt. Daddy built it under granpa's request. Gramma started grievin' an' crying', but what I really remembered was so clear to me from where I sat. Under gramma's long, black grievin' gown, she had on a pair of blue, glass slippers.
Just thinkin' back on how cold it was supposed to be that day reminded me of my name. Yuki Blanche. 'Yuki' was a Japanese word to represent Snow, apparently, and 'Blanche' was French for White. Snow White. Even though I weren't born in the winter, or even when there were snow on the ground. Seppen Hiver's name meant Snowflake Winter, literally, but it was supposed to be Winter Snowflake. And neither of us were born in the winter.
I still thought my name sounded nicer.
But getting back to gramma. Daddy said that she had dyed her hair to its normal blonde, and had dressed her hair and makeup up like she did at the ball. Daddy said that she must've been grievin' when her heart gave out. Said that she entered the afterlife lookin' like she did when she met my grampa. I thought it was kinda sweet. Daddy was just upset. Said they found her when they heard Harry and I cryin'. We were real hungry. I guess gramma hadn't meant to die that day, otherwise she woulda called a babysitter or sumthin'.
After that daddy seemed sad all the time. Mommy wouldn't let daddy tell me about his investigative cases, no matter how hard I asked. And I asked a lot and real bad. Mommy said they were too dark. I asked if daddy could bring a flashlight on his next cases and mommy laughed. I didn't get the joke. Mommy said that she meant dark in a way that meant sad and scary. Why wouldn't she just say sad and scary then?
Daddy was allowed to tell me 'bout one of his cases though, 'cuz it was silly and involved my Auntie Sandy. Auntie Sandy dressed like she was in her twenties, even though she had a daughter who was a lil' younger than Bert. Anyway, Auntie Sandy weren't married, but she had a boyfriend named Cid. She told daddy that she was worried that Cid might be proposing to her. She said that she would be fine either way, but she didn't like surprises. So daddy promised to find out.
Daddy said that he went to Cid's mailbox and rifled through his mail. Mom hit his stomach when he said that and told me to never do that. I promised her I wouldn't. Daddy said that he found a receipt for a ring in the mail, so that could only mean that Cid meant to propose. Then he went through Cid's garbage and found a beautiful bouquet of flowers. I was real confused, but daddy said Cid was probably planning to propose but got cold feet. He told Auntie Sandy about it an' she was relieved.
"But don't people want to get married?" I had asked, confused.
Mommy smiled at me. "Not everyone, dear. Not everyone. And we mustn't judge Aunt Sandy for her choice." I wasn't really a judgin' person, but I was confused. Mommy said that I would understand more when I got older. Seppen just called me dumb. Harry said I wasn't, but called me naive and gullible. I dunno what either of those words meant though, so I probably was just dumb.
Seppen and Cousin Ami were pretty much glued at the hip. They would do homework together, hang out at Uncle Buzz and Aunt Char's place... I always thought that they were an odd pair. Sep was obsessed with dance and looking clean while Ami was quite casual. Mommy said that they were good friends because they took after their dads so much and were great at making others laugh. I didn't know about Ami, but when Seppen was willing to talk to her little sister (me!) she could be quite hilarious. Harry said that I just thought that her jokes were funnier than they actually were. Really, I was just happy that I finally understood the joke. It seemed like everyone else in my family were laughing at a joke I made, but I never got it.
Seppen got to know our cousins' family pretty well. Aunt Char even started acting like her mommy. When she caught Seppen eating chocolate ice cream, she took it away and gave her healthy food. Seppen weren't happy 'bout it and complained 'bout it to mommy. Mommy phoned Aunt Char and 'commended' her (that's what daddy told me) for a job well done. They didn't know each other too well, being married to each other's brother-in-law an' all, but after that they started hanging out for 'girl' time. I kinda wished that they could include Auntie Sandy, but daddy promised me that Auntie Sandy had plenty of friends. I didn't really know my Cousin Tamera too well, but Seppen told me that she was dark. "You mean sad and scary?" I had asked her, and she said "Definitely, Yuki," but she said it in a real mean voice, like the one she used when was being 'sarcastic.' Then she laughed a mean laugh and I knew what I said weren't funny. I knew that Sep were laughin' at me.
Seppen weren't the only that was friends with our cousins. Cousin Ami also had three siblings that were triplets. I didn't really have a favourite outta Phyllis, Sydney and Andrew (named after my daddy), but Sydney and I were an awful lot alike, in looks an' in personality. They were a year or so younger than Harry an' I, but that didn't stop Harry from befriending Andrew. The first time they hung out, they were dressed the exact same way-in just their underwear! When I asked mommy if it were a family thing, she said that she had only ever seen Harry, Andrew an' I act that way.
It were funny, really. Our first day of school, Harry showed up in nothing but his Fruit of the Loom underpants. He had guts to do that, to be sure. All the girls who saw him gasped, and the older girls just laughed at my brother being silly. That didn't stop one of them from tattling on him to the principal. See, Harry went to school wearin' all the clothes that mommy had set out for him on his bed. That should've been a give away for her, cuz Harry didn't give no fuss about dressin' up real nice. Next thing you know, he was strutting in the school with just a thin piece of cotton between his thingy an' the world.
The principal phoned up my mommy and she probably broke the speed limit, she arrived at our school so fast. Harry put up an awfully big fuss, but he came to school with clothes on now. He still don't wear shoes, though. It was about that time that mommy decided to start teachin'. She had been taking courses for a lotta years, so was all prepared to start teachin'. She went by the last name 'Charming' for now, which was grandpa's last name. She only did that so that other kids wouldn't know that Seppen, Harry and I were related to her. It helped a little at first, but once they saw her hair and Sep and Harry's, an' once they knew that Harry was my twin, they put it all together. Also 'cuz we were royalty an' all.
Bert didn't get any attention 'cuz he was still at his boot camp boarding school whatever. He came home for a summer when he turned fifteen, but all he did was work out. One thing that really surprised me was that he had loads of yucky pimples. I didn't say nothin' 'bout it, 'cuz I didn't want to hurt his feelings, but they were real gross. Mommy and daddy noticed too, 'cuz I heard them talkin' to him about it. They ended up teachin' him all 'bout proper hygiene.
Mommy was real clingy while he was here, and cried so much when he had to go again. This time weren't as bad as before, though, 'cuz Bert was old enough to know how to make Skype calls and all that.
But getting back to the whole not wearin' clothes thing, I had sumthin' to admit. While Harry showed up in his underwear, I did too-'cept a girl wearing nothing but underwear weren't the same as a boy wearing nothing but underwear. Ami was there, and the second that she saw me she hurried me away. She acted really old like, and told me that bad things could happen to me while I was not wearing much. I didn't understand, she said that bad men would do things to me. I still didn't get it, so she made me hide while she found where I had put my clothing. I put it on, but like Harry, I refused to wear shoes. They were just uncomfortable!
When mommy found out (because Ami told her mom, of course, who told mine), she was even madder than when Harry didn't wear no clothes. She even started crying when I said that I wouldn't wear no clothes. That made me feel real bad, and I told her that the one dress I did like was the one Seppen had as a baby, and that I had worn when gramma died.
As soon as I said that, mommy got to work sewing me a new dress. I felt so bad 'bout makin' her do all that work that I started learning how to sew, in the middle of the night. I just copied all the stitches mommy had made and ended up finishing the dress. Mommy was real proud of me and ended up showing me how to use a sewing machine. Mommy even gave me a cape for me to wear when it got cold.
Mommy always wanted to help me with my homework, cuz I spent over twenty minutes on it each night. It were just simple things, like math questions and English work. At first, I accepted her help, but then I realized that I weren't learning right, so I ended up telling her that. She was worried, but eventually complied, long as I agreed to get private English tutoring from her. She said that my grammar were terrible, but that I got a big vocabulary. It were because when I were little, I watched all those Western cowboy shows. So I picked up words real good, but my grammar weren't right.
Andrew weren't my only male cousin. On Auntie Sandy's side, Tamera had two brothers that were twins-Marcus and Marty. Marcus were a bit dopey-even more than me!-rather like Moose Mason from the Archie comics. He even had the same blond hair! Marcus had a silly looking face and a goofy smile. He wore a weird, green hat and wasn't popular with the girls at my school. They always said rude comments to him 'bout Auntie Sandy and Uncle Cid not being married. It weren't even Marcus' fault that they weren't married! But all the same, if it weren't the fact that he were living with one parent, it was that he wore weird looking clothing. I always thought that he didn't care until I found him crying inside the bathroom. I didn't mean to go into the boys' bathroom! But I did, and he were real mad to see me. But I comforted him and he were grateful. He pretended that it never happened, though. I didn't mind.
Despite the fact that Marcus was his twin, the girls fawned over Marty. He had the same dark hair that we got from grampa, a sprinkle of freckles across his nose, an' brown eyes. All the girls thought that he was real cute. They even said that he dressed real cute, though I thought his graphic t-shirt was a little dumb. I would never say that, though!
Whenever one of the popular girls would spare me a moment 'cuz of my royalty, it was normally 'bout which boy I liked. "How about Marty?" they would say, "He's cute!" When I told them that he was my cousin, they would squeal and beg me to introduce them to him. It was all good and well for me, as it saved me the mortification of havin' to admit that I didn't have a crush on anyone.
Though sumthin' funny did happen... One day, when Seppen was collecting bugs for school (this was right about before her eleventh birthday), she picked up a giant bug (yuck!) and turned around an' saw that she was right outside of Auntie Sandy's house. She also saw that the big ol' house next to Auntie Sandy's house, the one that they had been building for ages, was all done, and people were driving into the driveway. Well, she went right on over and introduced herself. Turns out that they were royalty too! It were a family named the Fabians, an' it were little Prince Fabian and his mom that were staying in our little city for the winter. Imagine! Well, mom phoned them up as soon as Sep told her that and set up a little outing to the art museum.
While mom was driving her an' me over, she talked about how if I married the prince, we would be a proper blue-blood family again. I stuck out my tongue and told her I didn't want to married a stuck up prince, but she shushed me. The minute that we got there, she dragged me over to them and started chatting to Queen Fabian. Sure enough, they were talking about me and the prince-Stefan-getting married.
I rolled my eyes and turned to him. "Guess we're getting married, huh?"
"Looks that way," he said. I realized that he was wearing a cape that matched mine and just about burst with excitement. I chattered excitedly to him before realizing that proper introductions were in order. We shook hands and he smiled at me. He looked me in the eyes and I felt my cheeks growing all red.
Maybe I weren't so adverse to marryin' Stefan after all.
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